That question resonates with me. It's so true... I've LIVED it... but when I write, I'm RE-living it, over and over. But the truth is, I didn't go through it for nothing. People need my voice. They need to know they're not alone. That's why I choose to write. Soon, volume 1 of my duology on Thyroid Cancer will be self-published, followed by my autobiography on domestic violence. Both are worth the pain... and the healing... and we can do it together!

The question was simple: "Why should they choose you?" Answering that forced me to sharpen my value, refine my approach, and show up with confidence every single day. Once I got clear on that, everything else followed.

There is a moment in every woman's life when she realizes that the path she was given does not have to be the path she follows.

Someone asked me, 'Do you think you're too old to start a new career?' And for a split second, it hit a nerve, not because it was true, but because I realized how many women, myself included, quietly carry that belief. I had already lived so many chapters (chef, business owner, health coach) but in that moment, I saw something clearly: we don't age out of purpose. That question didn't stop me… it challenged me. And I decided right then, I wasn't starting over. I was stepping into everything I had been preparing for.

One question that changed my perspective was: "Why not you?" It challenged me to stop second-guessing myself and start recognizing my own capability. In an industry where I don't always see people who look like me, it's easy to question whether I belong or whether I should speak up. That question shifted my mindset, it reminded me that I'm just as capable as anyone else in the room. Since then, I've approached my work with more confidence, been more assertive in my role, and trusted my voice. It helped me see that my path isn't something I have to wait for permission to follow, I can step into it.

At 29, newly divorced and co-parenting two young sons, I made the decision to start college. I was determined to position myself to be financially independent, to build a life where I would never have to rely on anyone else again. It wasn't a path many believed I could sustain. I heard the doubts clearly. That it was too much. That I wouldn't finish. That it wasn't realistic. But instead of accepting those narratives, I asked myself a different question: Where will I be in four years if I don't try? I realized time would pass regardless. I could either remain where I was, still feeling unfulfilled, or I could take a chance on myself and build something more. I chose to start. I didn't begin with full confidence. I began with commitment. What followed exceeded even my own expectations. I completed my bachelor's degree in three years, and before graduating, I had already been accepted into graduate school. It wasn't part of my original plan, but someone else saw my potential before I fully saw it in myself. With the support of an academic counselor who encouraged me to apply, I took another leap, and it paid off. That experience reshaped how I view myself. I stopped measuring my potential against other people's expectations and started trusting what I was capable of building through action. Looking back, starting college was more than an educational decision. It was a defining moment. I chose growth over comfort, independence over fear, and belief over doubt. In doing so, I changed the trajectory of my life.

One question truly shifted my perspective: "What impact do you want to leave on others?" For a long time, I focused on stability and success in my career, but that question made me pause and reflect on purpose. It pushed me to think beyond titles and income and really consider how I was showing up for my community. That's when I realized my passion wasn't just in banking; it was in helping people understand their finances, empowering them with knowledge, and creating opportunities for others, especially in underserved communities. That question helped me align my career with my purpose. It gave me clarity and the confidence to step into roles where I could educate, mentor, and give back. It reminded me that success isn't just about what you achieve, but about the lives you impact along the way.

After experiencing a corporate layoff, I began searching for something meaningful but I wanted to stay connected with what I've been doing as a Data Analyst. What I realized, was a huge opportunity in supporting nonprofits through data and media. So I virtually volunteered by improving their online performance and attraction which lead them to the right audience.

The question was "If not now, then when"? It is true timing is everything and due diligence will create a solid foundation, but sometimes we have to let go of the swing and fly a little and know we will end up in a situation that enables further growth and development.

Once I asked a female mayor how she succeeded in a male-dominated field and her response was, "it's not about me, it's bigger than me." That forever changed how I view public servant leadership.

The question that changed everything for me was: "What am I waiting for?" It made me realize that I could not keep waiting for someone else to recognize my value, create the right opportunity, or give me permission to move forward. My time and experience are valuable, and I knew I could no longer invest them in places that did not fully appreciate what I brought to the table. That question pushed me to take ownership of my path. I stopped waiting to be chosen and decided to build the opportunity myself. That shift became one of the most important turning points in my career.

How will this affect everyone involved? As a policy writer, I've had to shift my mindset from viewing situations through a singular lens to thinking in a much more comprehensive and all-encompassing way. That shift taught me to think more critically, anticipate unintended consequences, and approach decisions with greater balance and empathy.

Even when it feels like nothing is moving forward, that's often the moment to keep pushing. Behind the scenes, something greater is aligning your dream into motion.

One question has stayed with me throughout my career and personal life: How would I want someone to approach me in this situation? Before addressing challenges or difficult conversations, I try to put myself in the other person's position. That mindset has helped me communicate with more understanding, deliver constructive criticism with respect, and offer meaningful positive reinforcement.

I don't get asked what do you need near as often as how can I help. Knowing what the talents, gifts and abilities of the people who are around you and working with you allow you to smash the box instead of just finding ways to work outside the box. Some people might think of this as being a trailblazer by finding new ways to accomplish goals.